Mid- Life Crisis?

I used to think the talk about mid-life crisis was basically BS. It was someone's excuse to piss off on their responsibilities and relive their youth. Yeah, I really used to think that. I thought that at 16, at 18, at 21, at 25, at 30, and even at 35. So what has changed? I am 38 now.

In all honesty, when I was 16 I thought someone 40 was really old! Now I realize it isn't that they were really old it was the burdens of life suck the life out of you by the time you are 40. The mid life crisis thing is simply realizing that. It is that point in your life I think between 38 and 45 where you ask yourself " What the hell am I doing here?". Then you realize that almost half of your life is gone, you can't get it back. It doesn't matter if you buy the coolest trendy clothes and get the newest hot hair style, time goes forward. I can go to the mall, put my flintstone feet in stilleto heels again, tight jeans, a low cut blouse and spend more money than I should. But when I come home I will still have a mortgage, a car payment, 2 kids (one that is 15!) , a husband, and a driver's license that says I am 38.
The other part of this crisis I call the 'oh shit factor'. This when you realize you don't get to get in your car and drive away from life's problems, realities. You have to be the responsible person your parents worked so hard to make you become. As they say "This is where the rubber hits the road.". This is when you find out just how valuable life and time truly is. This is when you really begin to live and know how very precious every moment with someone is. You know this reality because this is when you recognize your own mortality.
If we are lucky we come through this crisis like others and end up better people on the other side. That is really all we can hope for.